Many say they will never forget where they were when the twin towers fell. So where was I on September 11th?
That morning I went to an appointment with my friend who ran a massage therapy business out of her house. I thought it may relieve some stress. Two year old twins affected by cerebral palsy (plus 8 and 5 year old typical daughters) left me tired. It was extra exciting because I was also getting my hair cut. It was a real “Mom’s morning out” extravaganza!
As we finished our time in her shop we began to hear gasps and sobs from her living room.
When the appointment ended she went out to see what was going on. She found a friend, a New York transplant, watching the news on her TV. She was too scared to watch alone and had come over to be with someone. Before long I joined them in front of the TV…so confused by what we were seeing. Once I gathered myself together I headed for home.
But first I stopped by school to see if I should take my children home. It really felt like the sky was going to fall. I wanted my kids.
However, they assured me my girls would be safe at school and I reluctantly went home without them. The twins needed lunch and a nap and I distracted myself with their care. I always held each of them, one at a time, rocking and singing to them until I could lay them down drowsy enough for sleep.
Here is when I had the most clear moment of the day, clearer than the blue of that morning’s sky.
As I looked down at those two little bundles of sweetness that had brought so many changes, challenges, and stress the prior two years, I whispered, “thank you, Lord”. Not for their presence in my life, although I was thankful for that, but for the presence of the challenges in my life.
I knew that the past years had forced me to wrestle with MY God and MY faith and that I was on solid ground with what I know as Truth.
No matter what that day’s events were about to bring to the world, I knew Whose I was. As a result I have a confidence in my relationship with Jesus Christ. It was such a deeply peaceful moment and I cherish it. That is actually where I was on September 11th.
Subsequently, it was the beginning of a new stage in my journey of parenting children with disabilities. A time when I began to see it as a part of a much bigger (eternal) picture.
Jesus said, “You’re asking the wrong question. You’re looking for someone to blame. There is no such cause-effect here. Look instead for what God can do. We need to be energetically at work for the One who sent me here, working while the sun shines. When night falls, the workday is over. For as long as I am in the world, there is plenty of light. I am the world’s Light.”
John 9:3-5 MSG
For me, September 11th was a day to recognize that I had life, purpose and ultimately the promise of eternal life with MY loving savior.
It made me realize that I needed to go through the challenges and fatigue of the previous years in order to arrive at such a place of peace. As a result, a wonderful quote took up residence in my heart:
“For all that has been, thanks. For all that is to come, yes.”
Dag Hammarskjöld
Where were YOU on September 11th? Where are you now?
6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9 for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
1 Peter 1:6-9 NIV
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